The Abandoned

Written and illustrated by Ross Campbell



Succulent, teenage lesbians in the middle of the zombie apocalypse. Tons of drama. Tons of gore. Tons of plump, scantily clad girls with huge lips. It was good.

Zero Girl

Written and Illustrated by Sam Keith



Circles - safe, friendly, good.
Squares - dangerous, antagonistic, bad.

Amy has a crush on her guidance counsleor. She pursues him pretty relentlessly, and he is smitten. When she gets ashamed or embarrassed her feet get wet, like really wet. Discover the power of her strange foot fluid and the mystery of the re-occuring coaster vision.

Jumper - Jumpscars

Written by Nunzio Defillipis and Christina Weir
Art by Brian Hurtt



This is a prequel to the hit(?) movie released last month. The narrator, Jessica, is a woman retelling the story of how she came to be. There are people in the world called Jumpers that can teleport between places. Jessica is a Paladin and responsible for eliminating Jumpers. They are seen as a threat to the natural order of things. While tracking a recent case, we flip back and forth through several different parts of her history and an array of emotions. Decent, I'd watch the movie.

Crooked Little Vein

Written by Warren Ellis



From time to time, I read books that don't have pictures. This one, however, I feel would have saved my brain from conjuring the most vile things to accompany the text if the images were already there. Warren Ellis has invaded my psyche and made me feel really dirty. This book is about a self loathing private eye who is hired by the White House chief of staff to find a book that is the 'alternate constitution'. His search takes him through the seediest parts of America's sexual underbelly. What an adventure. Gross.

That Salty Air

Written and illustrated by Tim Sievert



An offbeat graphic novel about loss and misdirected anger. Hugh is a fisherman. He loves the sea and treats it with great respect. His household receives news of life and death on the same day. Grief stricken, Hugh lashes out at all the things he loves until he's forced to realize how precious it all really is.

WE READ COMICS BLOG TO CHANGE NAME

In a bold move for comic book takeover Liz Dellarocco has consumed more comics then should be possible and the renowned We Read Comics will be officially changed to
"LIZ READS COMICS". Thanks to all of our readers and contributors for making this such a great run of comic reviewing.please continue to watch this site and read "LIZ READS COMICS".
T'CHALLA

LIZ elated and exhausted after the official announcement.

Parasyte

By Hitoshi Iwaaki



HILARIOUS, and pretty disgusting. It starts with some fluffy, dandelion looking spores drifting into a town one night. Once they hit the ground, they open up and the little parasytes scamper into the night in search of a host. They slither into your ear and take over your brain, giving them complete control. Except for one poor little parasyte. Our main character, Shinichi, is sleeping with headphones on. With a couple of comical, failed attempts...it finally ends up getting into his hand. Shinichi is more resourceful than the parasyte anticipated, which leaves it fully matured in his arm. The interaction between the parasyte and Shinichi is really silly (I laughed out loud on several occasions), and the gore of the other parasytes is superb. Only two volumes so far, can't wait to read more.

The Surrogates

Written by Robert Venditti
Art by Brett Weldele



Set in the not too distant future, life has become basically digital. Technology has rushed forward to the age of the personal surrogate, androids that people send out into the world in place of themselves! Most people are content living sedentary, vicarious lives. One man is trying to bring back a world where people actually live their lives, rather than just watch it from afar. Two detectives from the local police department track this terrorist, and question how great this perfect world really is.

P.S. Disney has acquired the rights to this, hope they don't ruin it. Bruce Willis' name has been floating around in connection with the lead role.

Kwaidan

By Jung and Jee-Yun



In 12th Century Japan, Lady Orin pines for her warrior lover, Nanko, who has been away in battle. Jealous of her beautiful sister, Lady Akane mutilates Orin's face, beginning a spiral of despair that ends in the suicides of both lovers at Lake Amada. The evil Akane takes charge of the lake, now brimming with a strange power. This begins a complex web of revenge and redemption that spans two centuries. Jung's artwork, action-filled sequences, and expert sense of timing bring this tale to life, packed with ghostly encounters, swordplay, undead armies, beautiful landscapes, and strange demons. The lost spirits of these two unlucky lovers may still find freedom, but their hope now rests on the supernatural birth of a granddaughter...and her ability to unravel the secrets of the restless ghosts that haunt her, the Kwaïdan. Hotness. I TOTALLY love this book.

Perfect ten.

Life Sucks

By Jessica Abel, Gabe Soria, and Warren Pleece



You're a teenager. You're a vegetarian. You're a vampire. You work midnights at a convenience store. Your horrible boss is your master. Your best friend works at the copy store down the way. You have a crush on a cute, goth girl who comes in all the time. Her boyfriend is a ridiculous, vampire wannabe. Life sucks.

This book is cute and witty. The story unfolds at a decent pace and the art is easy on the eyes.

1 can short of a six pack.

war is hell by garth ennis art by howard chaykin

fighter planes, they look pretty sweet right? well in garth ennis new comic war is hell howard chaykin manages to make old planes with guns attached to them look like flying piles of garbage...and shit. now I'm not going to say much here that christian hasn't already said. yes i think garth ennis is sweet, yes i love planes with guns on them, and of course war is awesome, but the art is just so booty its unbearable. I'm going to give this comic one more chance, i did the math and the pros definitely outweigh the cons, but the art is just so important to me i cant see garth ennis saving this one. i think stan lees step brothers best friend or whoever the hell this guy is, just ruined a perfectly good fighter plane.

The Avengers: Disassembled

Written by: Brian Michael Bendis
Illustrated by: David Finch (and others)

Padraic brought up the fact that the House of Idea has decided to hit the bright, shiny rewind button on a lot of the stuff that has happened in the last couple years in the 'ol 616 (Civil War, Spidey's unmasking, death of Steve, etc). It's altogether infuriating, albeit not surprising that they have done so. In fact, I can remember Curtis and I talking a while back about how they should just man up, grow a pair, and kill Iron Man or something. Just friggin' do it already, quit jerking us around. Yeah, people bitch, yes, these characters are beloved, yes, yes, yes, fat kids would cry, but come on! You're grown ups! Do something groundbreaking, do something that takes guts! Make a decision and stick with it! If you write yourself into a corner, well, then, guess what? "Tough titty," said the kitty, "But, the milk's still good." Well, that's what my step-dad would say, anyway.

In any case, Padraic mentioned that he was going to go back to when this whole mess started, around the time that Avengers: Disassembled came out, to try to read between the lines, so to speak. Apparently, (probably after being prodded by frustrated, high-strung fan turds like myself) Bendis has hinted that the reason for these rewinds isn't because the writers are stuck in a glass box after the ramifications of Civil War, Spidey's press conference, etc., but it's because of, well, something else that happened, er, before, um, and yeah, you'll have to go back and read... um, other stuff. In other words, he's still working it out in his fat, shiny head. Maybe you guys could set me straight on this, because I haven't been keeping up (the bakery doesn't pay me in comics like you guys do) but I heard some shit about Mysterio showing up and giving Parker the old "chance to do it all again." Mysterio? You have got to be pulling my dick. THAT SUCKS. Mysterio? There just aren't any words. I've got no problem with Bendis; in fact, I usually stick up for the guy and a lot of the BS he's churned out since working for Marvel, but after reading it, I think Avengers: Disassembled should instead be called Avengers: Disappointing.

I'm going to give you some bullets, though, of the parts I sort of liked (spoiler alert):

• Stark gets wasted. I mean crocked. At a UN conference, no less. He goes on to call the Latverian delegate "ratfink" and, my favorite, "pally." Funny stuff - Oh, and remember how I said Stark got wasted? Not really.
• The obligatory two-page gatefold featuring virtually the entire Marvel Universe at the end of issue #501. Oh, heavens. In our darkest hour, our friends have all shown up to help us, in costume, in a badass pose, right outside the rubble of Avenger's headquarters. They're all there, even Puck, arms crossed (some with fists on hips), looking so badass. Look at how badass they all look. All of them.
• She-Hulk flips out, throws a truck onto Captain America, rips The Vision in half.
• Cap gets BuddaBuddaBudda-ed by a bunch of magic mind Nazis.

You should read this, but only when you're pooping. I give it a 'prick' out of 'tease'.

Spiderman: With Great Power #1-3

Marvel comics Dave Lapham(Stray Bullets, Young Liars) on writing chores with Tony Harris(Starman, Ex Machina) on art
Yes it's the billionth retelling of Spider mans origin but subtle twists keep it fresh. David Lapham's dialog is great as always, and his version of Peter/Spidey is awesome. I've loved Tony Harris for years and his pencils on this book are top shelf!

4 out of 5 delicious wheat cakes

GRAVEL #2

writer-warren ellis,mike wolfer art(?)/ vomit projected through a crude silkscreen scratched out with a paperclip by raulo caceres. published by Avatar $3.99 ongoing.
gravel is a SAS (the british precursor of the u.s. navy seals) magician who shoots people with real and magic guns in graphic ways.the story is a cool action movie about him trying to get 7 different sections of some magic book from some other magicians.story....aight.art...really booty,like raulo caceres concept of perspective is changing with each panel.sometimes i have no idea what's happening.aughh..... this comes out on time all the time but i haven't seen a new Black Summer in 2 months...man,sheeeeeit. cool action though.
---1 head smashed open
---2 magic guns
---art is booty ass with dookie creeping over the top.

it took me 2-3 times longer to write this it took to read the comic,and the post is like two lines ...c'mon y'all.

TRANSHUMAN #1

w-jonathan hickman (nightly news,pax romana) a-JM ringuet (colors on death comes to dillinger) Image comics $3.50
Transhuman is super cool and really high concept.this first issue is a documentary film produced to introduce you to this corporate world of developing the "person whose capacities so exceed currant man that we would no longer easily define them as human" they'd be like...TRANSHUMAN!(i don't know if all issues will be docu style but i'm down to find out..by readin 'em!) Like Hickman's other work it's got a lot of meat/soy to it,so for $3.50 you get almost a whole meal. jonathan hickman has been reminding of warren ellis,while totally doing his own thing, AND american and i like it! It is really kick-ass to read homeboys work and be like "and this mother-fuckers not even english,irish,or scottish!" .....the art...awesome.i'll be lookin for this dude now.i read this book he colored called "death and the man who would not die" and it has these painted colors....AWESOOME! Msr. Ringuet can draw.i'm down.NEXT.....
HOLLERTRONIX
j.hickman----pronea.com
Jm ringuet--- type him into blogspot

----COOL POINTS----
-the "Institute for Ethics in Emerging Technology" gave it a nod on their "blog" but...refered to it as "a new graphic novel series" which doesn't make much sense (this a a rant to come for later....get ready for it.)
-Sandy would love it in the same ways and tell me how while we drank the same beer.
-the cats left me alone while i read it.they could tell it was good and knew not to mess with me.
BLACK PANTHER WATCHING BAD TASTE,WE WATCHIN' BAD TASTE!

THE JOKERS' BONER

so this is from a site entitled "yesbutnobutyes" list of unintentionally hilarious comic panels, there's more here.


ha ha ha ......john this ones for you.

ULTIMATE HUMAN #3

w-warren ellis (everything,transmetropolitan) a-cary nord (conan)
sup! this is the third issue of the awesome iron man versus/teams up with the hulk mini series.this series has sweet writing by waren ellis that reminds me that superhumans are still humans but much cooler.cary nords art continues to punt asses far into the end zone and makes the hulk look terrifying.(if you've never seen his ill ass art on dark horse's "CONAN" then treat yo self and check it out.conan is a great character who always gets the ladies and a flagon of ale) The series starts with tony stark trying to cure bruce banner of his hulk-ness and then they beat the tar outta eachother.the re-envisioned leader his his enormous head and things really heat up.in this issue we learn more about the leaders transformation and origin as well as his plans for the Stark/Banner duo.the conclusion comes next month and i dunno whats gonna happen but hopefully a giant sized head gets splattered by some giant sized hands.
---lola and destro (my cats) can't come into the bar where i read this comic so don't tell 'em they missed it.
BLACK PANTHER DRINKING BEER,WE DRINKING BEER!

BLACK PANTHER #35

BACK TO WAKANDA YOU SUCKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

whats up, as you know i love the black panther so then you can imagine how awesome it is when he is finally going back 2 africa . to rule his ppl , kick ass and jus genrally be a king. but OH NO!
when he gets back he learns of his sister being kidnapd by killmonger the only adversary the badass panthers never murk'd . so saffice to say this was a setup comic and hopefully we will see the next episode knock down that punk ass bitch killmonger ... (with storm out fighting for the massiah complex who knows) its a safe bet that since T'challa's"freed an alien planet, helped fight the hulk, and buried one of his best friends" (i.e. captain america)he is going to waste this this chump with extreme prejudice .

2 points for no magic frogs
2 points for africa
2 points for wify not being there (a lil dude time allways helps)
3 points for no skrull MLKs or Malcom Xs
1 point for the money

and what do you got???? a sucka in a uniform waiting to get shot?
NOPE!

a step by step booklet for you to get your game on track ... not your wig pushed back

welcome to the 10 point gangsterdome
THE BLACK PANTHER
back to africa pt1

T'CHALLA!


BLACK PANTHER EATING COOKIES >>>> WE EATING COOKIES!

Sorrow - Image Comics

Written by Rick Remender and Seth Peck. Art by Francesco Francavilla.



I love Rick Remender, but... meh. Forgettable. Except for the first Wilford Brimley joke. sThe art was pretty sweet. I guess Sorrow was OK. I read all four issues.

Plot: tuck in a small town, haunted, people get possessed, must escape.

Mrs. Claws didn't lift her head out of the food bowl to comment.
Kitty didn't read Sorrow.
Sasha didn't read Sorrow.

Ghost Whisperer - IDW

Story by Becca Smith and Carrie Smith. Art by Elena Casagrande. Based on the hit TV series created by John Gray, I guess.



Yeah, I read it. No, I have never seen the show.

This girl, Melinda Gordon, can communicate with ghosts that nobody else can see. She helps them "cross over into the light," something ghosts don't do if they have unfinished business. This one starts with a girl who was teased by classmates seeking revenge after they humiliate her. She's using who she thinks is the god Osiris to help her. Cliffhanger at the end.

It was aight. I didn't know exactly what was going on at first, but it's pretty easy to figure out and follow despite the narrative being a little disjointed. The girls in it are hot. It has the potential to be interesting. I'll at least pick up issue #2.

Mrs. Claws woke up to purr at the cover for two seconds.
Kitty gives Ghost Whisperer a look that indicates she, like I, will check out the second issue if I bring it home.
Sasha gives it a smile, even though she didn't read it. I think she just likes Jennifer Love Hewitt.

All Star Superman #10 - DC

Grant Morrison writes real good and Frank Quitely draws his ass off

Unanswerable questions, tyrant suns, the bottled city of Kandor, Earth Q, Lois lane(is super hot), Kandor Emergency Corps, the birth and death of Superman. I read this comic twice.
Modern mythology at its best.
Five out of five dwarf stars.

BPRD: better than Hellboy !??

Writers-Mike Mignola (hellboy,baltimore) and John Arcudi (the mask) Art-Guy Davis (baker street,sandman mystery theatere) published by Dark Horse
Since this read off started i've been making a strong effort to get caught up on BPRD.and in that time BPRD:1946 came out as well as the abe sapien mini series,this has got me really pumped to find out more about abe's past.for those that don't know:the merchandising megalith known as Hellboy works for the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defense (BPRD) and is on a spiritual journey to find himself right now and this series follows the adventures of the squad back home as they fight a plague that transforms peeps into frog monsters!! (how's that for a run on sentence,hmmh? i READ COMICS so for sooome reason i think it's ok to be functionally illiterate....i dunno) the cast of characters in this book is phenomenal and very layered.we are told very little of these characters and only learn about them little by little along with the other characters.the art by michigans own Guy Davis is great and moody,the design of the monsters,villans,and equipment of the BPRD is kick-ass and very practical.(i'm constantly distracted from the book by the impecable design on the bprd standard issue carbine...ill) ohhh....right the plot.A really awesome nazi villan from WWII returns to call up some elder gods with unexpected consequences and the team loses a fantastic assest and amazing friend in The Black Flame.Abe also continues to delve deeper into his lost past involving a paranormal adventuring society at the turn of the century in Garden of Souls. and things really come to a head in Killing Ground. we learn more of capt.daimos past and are left terrified for his future, and my jaw crashes through the floor is astonishment of these fine sirs storytelling abilities. get up on BPRD:1946 asap! it's only three issues in and is the story of the BPRD's first mission,without any specially trained agents(hellboy's just a wittle baby in '46) With art by Paul Azaceta (potter's field)
you could read this without reading any other hellboy/bprd....the ensemble cast of the modern day series is totally worth the read.is BPRD actually better then Hellboy? i don't now about BETTER but i certainly get more excited about a new BPRD ish then i do about a new hellboy ish.maybe it's that they are more characters in BPRD and i feel like i really know them, or it could just be the design of the shotguns.
---BPRD-the black flame: 4.5 outta five appropriately cooked eggs over easy
---BPRD-garden of souls: this one goes to eleven
---BPRD-killing ground : 4 outta 5 toes NOT poking out da hole in yo sock
---BPRD-1946 (so far) : 4 outta 5 beers NOT chadwicked (an awesome relief!)

Ultimates 3

listen up hoon's im loving this book / drug wait.......
uh oh. dont even get me started how ill this book is .. all ready well on its 3rd installment i am MORE than satisfied. lemme jus run down some reasons real qwik right eha:

1. black panther
2. every girl looks like theyre about to or are in the middle of having sex
3. ACTION
4. valkyrie
5. fighting

so the art jacks streetfighter 2 zero i know... so what . thats a dope style .

this book is like being addicted 2 crack, alot happens all the time and you have no control.

just loosen up and collect some bottles so you can get that next rock you stuffy busterfinks

im giving this book 10 dime honeys for every 10 honeys


bong bong

Tales of Terror - Dynamite Entertainment

Written by Carlos Trillo
Art by Eduardo Risso (100 Bullets!)



This is a collection of 11 short stories with an EC comics meets Rod Serling flavor. Dynamite scooped them up (despite much digging around on the internet, I can't seem to find the publications that these were originally published in) and printed them in the U.S. for the first time last year. It's kinda like if Sin City were plunged into a horror movie marathon on a Saturday afternoon. Enjoyed it.

Shit the Bed! It's a comic book read off!

Thanks to XmasX for mentioning that he read a shit-ton of comics a couple of weeks ago. Well sir, I accept your challenge! I too, shall read an ass-load of comics! Our "contest" began 3 weeks ago and has been heated, to say the least. So, now we're keeping a list of all comics read that week. The read off starts every Wednesday(NCD*) and goes through Tuesday(NCE**).

Here's my list from last week(12th-18th), I won't be reviewing my entire list every week...don't worry:

• Serenity#1 Dark Horse Joss Whedon/Will Conrad
  
• Judenhass Gn Aardvark/Vanaheim Dave Sim
  
• Batlash #4 DC Peter Brandvold and Sergio Aragones/Dave Severin
  
• Walking Dead #47 Image (still hate this book) Kirkman/Charlie Adlard and Cliff Rathburn
  
• BPRD 1946 #3 Dark Horse (every "Hellboy universe" book is awesome) Mignola
  
• Evil Dead #3 Dark Horse Mike Verheiden/John Bolton
  
• Abe Sapien #2 Dark Horse Mignola/Jason Alexander (the dude from Seinfeld? no.)
  
• Doctor Who #2 IDW Gary Russell/Nick Roche
  
• Locke and Key #1 IDW (written by Stephen Kings son) Joe Hill/Gabriel Rodriguez
  
• Screamland #1 Image Harold Sipe/Hector Casanova
  
• Cemetery Blues #2 Image Ryan Rubio/Thomas Boatwright
  
• Gutsville #3 Image comics, Puritanical society trapped in the belly of a giant sea beast with art by Frazer Irving!
• Avengers Fairy tales #1 Marvel C.B. Cebulski/Joao Lemos
  
• Goon #22 Dark Horse - This comic is the the shit, the writing and art by Eric Powell art top shelf. Check out the definition of the word "Goon": 1921, "stupid person," from gony "simpleton" (c.1580), of unknown origin, but applied by sailors to the albatross and similar big, clumsy birds (1839); sense of "hired thug" first recorded 1938 (in ref. to union "beef squads" used to cow strikers in the Pacific northwest), probably from Alice the Goon, slow-witted and muscular (but gentle-natured) character in "Thimble Theater" comic strip (starring Popeye) by E.C. Segar (1894-1938). She also was the inspiration for British comedian Spike Milligan's "The Goon Show." What are now "juvenile delinquents" were in the 1940s sometimes called goonlets. Word.
• Simon Dark #5 and #6 DC Writen by Steve Niles(30 Days of Night) with art by Scott Hampton. This book get better with each ish, organized white collar crime with dark occult goings-on in Gothan city.
  
• Lone Ranger and Tonto #1 Dynamite Good comic book, even though the artist likes to put mascara on the Lone Ranger and he can't draw horses none to good.
• Iron Fist #13 Marvel Matt Fraction(the Order, Five fists of Science) and Ed Brubaker(Captain America, Criminal) are two of the best writers going! Still one of the best comic books every single month!
  
• The Order #9 Marvel Matt Fraction and Barry Kitson
• Captain America #36 Marvel Ed Brubaker, Butch Guice and Mike Perkins. Bucky is the new Cap and it rules!
• Dead of Night #2 Marvel Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa and Brian Denham
  
• Astro City Special DC Kurt Busiek and Brent Anderson
  
• Thor #7 Marvel Micheal Straczynski and Oliver Copial
• Iron Man #27 Marvel Daniel and Charles Knauf/Roberto De La Torre
  
• Comic Book Comics #1 Evil Twin Fred Van Lente/Ryan Dunlavey
  
• Rex Mundi vol. 1-4 Dark Horse Arvid Nelson/Juan Ferreyra
  
• Criminal vol. 1 and 2 Marvel Ed Brubaker and Sean Phillips
• Blade of the Immortal vol. 1 Dark Horse Hiroaki Samura
  
• Black Panther #34 Marvel Reginald Hudlin/Frances Portela
  
• Astounding Wolfman #1-5 Image Kirkman/Jason Howard
  
• The Sword #1-6 Image Luna Brothers

So, that was that crazy week. I'm gonna keep reading mad comics, and reviews proper will start soon. Black Panther read comics...we read comics. Word.


*New Comic Day
**New Comics Eve

Alive: The Final Evolution

Written by Tadashi Kawashima
Art by Adachitoka



High school. Japan. Alien Virus. Suicide.

This starts out like most Shonen manga. The setting is the local high school. You have friends, bullies, girls with short skirts that barely conceal. You throw in an alien virus that makes people commit suicide and some guys with semi-apparent, evil glimmers in their eyes, and you've got Alive. Strange powers begin to manifest, like the ability to vaporize people. Mmmmm, bloody mist. So, these people with powers call each other 'comrade'. Our hero, Taisuke, is pretty resistant to the whole idea. I haven't seen his powers just yet, but all the bad dudes seem to recognize him as one of their own. Can't wait to see how things shape up in the next volume! Three volumes have been released in the U.S. and fourteen in Japan! I don't think I'd recommend this for our younger readers. It's loaded with fairly gruesome death, and just the right amount of exposed panties.

Misericordia

yo check this out .... i didnt read this comic
no one has.... cus there aint no words (yet)... jus dope drawings. from what i gather this book takes place in the future and the star of it is a straight up fox.(she doesnt wear a whole lot of clothes ) thrrs robots and i think the government tells everyone what to do all the time. it seems
like a wack future....... cus thrrs no trees .
im pretty sure that this chick is going to stick it to the man.


once again ..... thrr aint no words.


i give the art 9 outta 10 chicken wings smuthered in franks ..... and one bone ...
basiclly an uneaten plate of wings .

so get some napkins and gnaw on this s$#!


Misericordia by definition basically means "to give mercy "*



(*qoute found on internet ...may or may not be true and or pornography)

BOHDA TE

--Slave Labor Graphics w/a-Jamie Smart (PREVIOUSLY:UBU BABU) $2.95
Hey! if you like Invader Zim or toilet humor in any of it's awesome forms then scwoop this on up! It has an excellent narrative composed of seemingly unconnected vignettes that then come back around to make TOTAL EFFIN' HILARITY!! It features tiny dancing poo's that form together to make POOP-ZILLA,and then through pressure and heat they transform into "MECHA-POOPZILLA"! Plus....cute animal thingy's that kill stuff...possibly the WHOLE WORLD! I can't wait for the guffawing that will commence with issue #2!

Dead Space - Image Comics

Written by Antony Johnson (Wasteland)
Art by Benjamin Templesmith (If you don't know, get learned.)

If you read Wasteland, and you should have, then you will know what to expect from Mr. Johnson. This guy writes, and he fucking writes well. He takes his time and develops a story. He fleshes out everything between A and B and if you can take the time to enjoy it, savor it even, the pay off will be well rewarding.

As for Templesmith, well that guy is just getting better and better with every photoshop layer that goes over his pencils. Lately he has been coming into his game pretty hard. Templesmith has found his element and gone beyond it with Wormwood and Fell in the last few years. He may not be for everyone, but he fucking should be.

First off, Dead Space is a tie in, and we all know how tie in's usually go. Shitty, especially when it comes to video games. Brutal.

Dead Space shaping up to be something nice, I promise. The story is going to creep on you and then infect your soupy brain with A+ Sci-Fi jargon, some grim murdalizing of space colonists, and some creepy future religious zealots. Oh yeah, and monoliths.

If they can keep it on time, it should be a nice little Sci-Fi/Horror surprise to ring in the spring with.

I give it a lower heating bill out of a wealth of expenses.

War Is Hell:the first flight of the Phantom Eagle

---Marvel comics.w-garth ennis, a-howard chaykin
good first issue! a cool story about a dandy-ish fighter pilot who fibs his way into a joint U.S. and RAF squadron in WWI. Garth Ennis is currently the best writer of experiences in combat and war without ever experiencing it first hand and he really kills on this book. Howard Chaykin's art looks like it was done by the aforementioned "POOP-ZILLA"of Bohde Te. The art is distractingly bad and changes the pace of the book beacause i'm slightly astounded that the art made it through the printing press.However, I hold faith that suffering through the dookie art will really be worth it and i'm excited for issue #2.

Wolverine 62 and 63

aight mutha effn wolverine really got booty there for a second , but now its really heating up the arts better the action has something to do with something (messiah complex) and hes f#@kn wit a super villin..... mystique ... trackin that buikit down and tryin to kill 'er for some reason or another i dont really care, jus give me mad explotions and stabbing ppl with claws . who doesnt like that?????oh yea theyres an old west twist.

its ok to read this comic again

the art does not suck anymore

pick it up

i give it three outta four clean socks (:'.':)

t'challa!

my real advice:
never eat a muffin loaf

Madame Mirage - Top Cow Productions, Inc.

Writer: Paul Dini. Art: Kenneth Rocafort (who totally rocks my fort).



This one's a little hard to explain, because it reveals itself to be more and more awesome as the plot unravels. Anyway, this super-babe takes on an evil organization called Aggressive Solutions International. She can manifest guns out of nowhere and can shapeshift, all thanks to a rad science genius girl, upon whose sister Madame Mirage is based. Not only do the story, dialogue and art (especially the art) kick so much ass, the book makes you consider the philosophical boundaries of consciousness and reality. The book also explores character cliches in a way that reinvents the character cliche itself. It's like the quantum observer effect in physics.

Kitty gives Madame Mirage a "breeeeep!"
Madame Mirage makes Mrs. Claws lick the beer bottles on the counter.
Sasha is hiding under the bed.

Seriously, read it. If you hate it, come find me and I'll buy you a beer.

2nd OPINION:Bat Lash

I concur good fellow.
(also,the art is great and is by classic western comic artist john severin)

Bat Lash - DC Comics

Written by Sergio Aragones (dude who wrote Groo), and Peter Brandvold. Art by John Severin.



I guess this dude's been around for decades, but I first ran into him in Jonah Hex. Now he's got his own (mini-?) series. Breakdown:

Issue 1: We laugh at the dandy Bartholomew Lash and his antics and romantics. And his vest. We laugh at his vest.

Issue 2: He fights a bear, saves the girl.

Issue 3: It's called "Necktie Party." 'Nuff said.

Issue 4: Gatling gun.

If you are a fan of the classic western style, pick this up. You'll laugh a lot. You'll say "Holy [insert expletive of choice]" quite a bit too. Mostly, you'll recall why you love westerns in the first place: Six-shooters, hangings, horses, corruption and, of course, revenge. My only complaint: not enough whiskey.

Mrs. Claws gives it a hearty "meow."
Kitty gives it a "chirp."
Sasha still doesn't read comics, but she'd probably take a nap on it.

100 bullets : split second chance

aight chall .... i told yall to peep that first trade for 100 bullets yesterday ... so i took my own advice and read the second one... and of course its filled with ill tales of payback ... but for what??? it seems that everything is connected in ways we would never imagine and it all goes back to the past .... the secret past .... the untold secret agent past of everyone this kat with the case visits... and unlike the first jam this book really left me hanging. just a lil insentive to buy more comics i guess ... but im feelin it, the art feels the same ... peeps from the first book are back ... and the ice cream man shows you what to do with a fudgesickle and a girlfriend

sshs frsssh

i give that 38 shetlin pone's outta 45 shetlin pone's

the zombie: simon garth written and drawn by kyle hotz

this comic is awesome, the art is fresh and the story is cool and original. the government accidently unleashes the zombie virus (you know the one) on a small hick town, at which point people start to eat each other. the twist is there is one good zombie simon garth who works his way through tons of zombies, hicks, and shotguns to get a little girl back to her mom. theres not only tons of violence theres tons of hick violence so if you love zombies, heroes, and hicks getting murked, then yer gonna love this book. the series just ended like last week so the trade probably wont be out fer a couple months but when it does, read that comic.

Dark Ivory - Image Comics

Story and Art by Joseph Michael Linsner and Eva Hopkins



I've always thought there should be more comics about moody, over-developed, teen goth girls.

No I haven't. For those of you unfamiliar with the work of Linsner, he's the creator of a comic called Dawn, from the 90's. Here it is again. Dawn for the next decade. I might read another issue just to reassure myself, but all in all, no thanks.


What a hunk.

Dead of Night - Marvel Comics

Written by Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa
Illustrated by Various artists



Remember Creepshow? Tales from the Crypt? All those awesome, short horror stories? This comic revisits that genre pretty well. Your narrator, The Digger, tells tales of murder and intrigue with a sardonic nonchalance. The first issue is an introduction/explanation of how Man-Thing came to be.

Only two issues so far, I'll be keeping my eye out for more.

comic read off malarky

hiya! alright,this "comic read off" of ours started about three weeks ago when i read 52 comics one week (26 of which was the beginning of ed brubakers' "CAPTAIN AMERICA", check it out. he turns cap into this super ill espionage story and brings back BUCKY AND IT MAKES SENSE!? i know...trust me).Curtis, in his continuing effort to be overlord of the comic shop, threw a tantrum and began reading immediately....uhmm....i...uhh...he...uhh...he has then proceeded to hand me my ass on a weekly basis at a steady margin of 30% (@$$HOLE!! and this guy has kids, two jobs, and a playstation3)! So, since i'm constantly playing catch up and curtis is going to have the whole comic shop read by this summer, the reviews on here will be very short and frequent (i mean the more time we use writing, the less time we'll have to read, and i have gotta win this thing one of these weeks! right?....). I will try my best to not give lazy reviews like "it sucks, NEXT!" or overuse the joke "hated it!" while snapping my fingers or two word reviews like "shit sandwich" to everything, but it WILL happen so bear with me. HEY! here's a quote from the intro to the orig. script for "WATCHMEN" by alan moore to dave gibbons:
" Alright. I'm psyched up. i've got blood up to my elbows, veins in my teeth and my helmet and kneepads securely fastened. let's get out there and make trouble!"

100 bullets


yea i read that piece...... i got the trade paperback hook up from lucky and crushed it in like 40 min's...its three stories all of which are fresh! the first is about a super foxy latina babe that gets some payback. the seconds about a bartender that guess what???....tries to get some frickn payback , and the third is a lil vignette of what happens in a police station on christmas and all the cops are white and all the bad guys are black........ hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
... lets jus say its not as good as the 1st or 2nd story arc
everything has to do with some kat showing up outta the blue with a briefcase and a mission for you .... in the brief case is a gun with untraceable bullets , then dude tells yah you're above the law?!??!?! word? above the law? hells ya

the art is ok i give dem sh$ts 7 outta 10 jagerbombs

overall

its tight

PEEP IT

'76 - Image Comics

Written by B. Clay Moore and Seth Peck
Illustrated by Ed Tadem and Tigh Walker




Two stories in one comic, a bitchin' double feature.

Jackie Karma:
It's 1976, life is smooth. You've got kung fu, street fighting, and a team of badass mother truckers coming back together to keep an old rival in line.

Cool:
Los Angeles. Bounty Hunters. Strippers. Drugs. Shenanigans.

Quentin Tarantino should read this comic.